


Truth In Your Eyes

by hanjisonly



Category: Derry Girls (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bi!Michelle, Erin being excited as usual, F/F, F/M, Internalised Homophobia, James being a supportive cousin, Nervousness, Orla is babie, Pride, Pride Parades
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2019-12-08
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:22:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21548305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanjisonly/pseuds/hanjisonly
Summary: Michelle's internalised homophobia always stemmed from the fact that she could never draw her eyes away from Clare's lips when she's rambling.
Relationships: Clare Devlin/Michelle Mallon, James Maguire/Erin Quinn
Comments: 1
Kudos: 60





	Truth In Your Eyes

All the girls, plus James were currently in Erin's room, throwing around ideas for what they could do for the weekend. Until, Clare shot up, looking excited. "What?" Orla frowned, confused at the girl's frantic behaviour, "Have you got an idea?" James adds in a polite tone, which was basically his default voice. "How about we go to a pride parade?" Clare suggested, "What...like a gay pride parade?" Michelle asked looking distasteful from her position on the floor, where she was nursing a bottle of vodka. The plump girl simply nodded, looking nervous. "I didn't know gay people actually existed 'till I met you, Clare...'' Orla drawled, sounding dumbfounded. 

Erin simply grinned, "Okay!", James nodded in agreement with his girlfriend, he didn't really know how to say no, even if he wanted to. Michelle looked uncertain, "What if all of 'em try n' hit on me? I would boke, no offence" she finished in a disgusted tone, shooting an apologetic look towards Clare. The small girl frowned at her friend's seemingly negative reaction and opinion of her identity. "There'll be free drink" Erin persuaded, which instantly persuaded Michelle on board. The next day, the girls were packed in the car like sardines, waiting for Mary to start the car.

"Are you sure you guys want to go?" The older woman asked, unsure. The five nodded frantically, Orla humming in the affirmative. The car started and so did their journey. Once they arrived at the street, they all clambered out of the car, sending farewells and reassuring looks to Erin's worried mother. They were immediately scooped up by the parade goers, Clare beamed as her and her friends joined the parade. Michelle nodded at a few people, swiping some drinks, she tried to hold back a grimace as the foul taste of alcohol hit her taste buds. "It's so colourful!" Orla shouted over the music, looking in awe at the colours and rainbows drifting about, James smiled at the girl's antics, his grip tightening on Erin's hand. The girl was looking around amused, "this is pretty awesome, Clare..." she looked over to the giddy girl only to find her ecstatic friend talking to Michelle, who was currently downing more booze. 

"It's so bloody great here! It's a wee bit loud but still." Clare rambles to a seemingly bored Michelle, the taller girl only reacted when Clare's pale hand rubbed against her arm. Michelle tried to contain her blush before becoming confused. Why the fuck was she so flustered? The dark-haired girl pondered before taking another swig. Soon, the plump blonde girl and lanky brunette were separated from their friends as the crowd began to sparse. The other three didn't seem to be bothered by the lack of their presence, so the two decided to go the bathrooms as Michelle found herself becoming increasingly uncomfortable by the large crowd. The taller girl sat down on the floor, her back against the dirty wall, Clare grimaced at this.

"Isn't that unsanitary?" the blonde asked, Michelle simply rolled her eyes, ''Probably, who gives a feck? come sit down, tiny''. Clare rolled her eyes and sat down, "So are ya liking it?" the blonde asked, Michelle simply nodded, not offering her opinion on anything in fright she might let something slip out she can't exactly take back. "So..." the brunette trailed off, hoping to break the awkward silence between her and the other girl. Clare suddenly turned around to face Michelle, still sitting on the floor. Michelle snapped and grabbed Clare's face : "Do you want this?" she asked, chest heaving, the plump blonde nodded, pressing her lips to the brunettes. Both sat still, kissing each other for a moment before a shocked Michelle pulled off. She didn't look shocked at Clare but rather her own actions, tears filled Clare's eyes as she stared into Michelle's unsure ones. Suddenly the dark haired Irish girl stood up and broke into a sprint. Leaving a lonely Clare and her bottle of alcohol behind. 

Her mind didn't catch up to her feet as she ran through the crowd, hoping to get away from whatever just happened between her and her supposed 'best-friend'. It terrified her but what terrified her more is that she actually _enjoyed_ it. Sparks of denial went throughout Michelle's heaving chest. She finally stopped running once she reached a stand, a dark skinned girl was standing there holding small pride flags, she offered one to Michelle and it couldn't have been more painstakingly ironic. It was almost as if Michelle took it her fate would be sealed : She was gay and in love with Clare, some weird symbolism for acceptance. It was like fate had lent a hand to the Irish girl when she heard Clare's loud voice over the music. 

"Michelle! Wait! I just want to talk!" She boomed across the parade, the dark skinned girl bit her lip in amusement. Michelle rolled her eyes at the girl before slowly walking over to a seemingly exhausted Clare. "Bleeding hell! I didn't know you could run that fast..." she exclaimed before the conversion turned into awkward silence. "I'm sorry" Michelle blurted out, the other girl simply looked confused, "for what?". "For what? I fucking kissed you!!!" She shouted at Clare, the plump girl's eyes widened in acknowledgement, "Oh yeah" she trailed off dumbfounded. "But I thought you wanted to" she continued, staring at Michelle's angry face. "I DO! Okay? That's the problem, I have been wanting to kiss you since we were 5 Clare...but I'm scared!" the other girl shouted, frustrated with this situation and completely insecure. "What are you scared of?" the blonde asked quietly, seemingly hurt. "Everything, my feelings for you, what this means, my parent's reactions...I can't afford this, I can't fucking afford this!" She shouted, kicking a nearby bin. Half of her shouts were covered by the blasting music. "Let's talk somewhere more private and less loud" Clare decided, dragging Michelle into a ally way, where the parade could still be seen but most of the noise was muffled. 

"I like you, so bloody much. I have since we were like...14. I want to be with you but...you're scared aren't you? I'm not, I've already came out for Christ's sake!" she explained to a tense Michelle. "Well I haven't okay!?!?" the taller Irish girl shouted, her voice lowered as she continued speaking, "I'm scared of the talks, the looks we'll get, my Ma's reaction. I know she was okay about James being 'gay' and all but he wasn't. That was all by theory. I'm actually bisexual. What about practice? knowing her only daughters a sinner?-", "You don't know that for a fact..." Clare reasoned, the other girl seemingly agreed and calmed down slightly. "I like you too Clare but...I'm still terrified."

"I know you are, but I am too. Even though like 2 minutes ago I said I wasn't...that's not so grand but we have each other'' she clasped her hand into Michelle's trembling one. Michelle then kissed her. Again. "Okay... I want to enjoy this night" she propositioned. Clare nodded in agreement. Even though they were in a dirty ally way with blasting music over their heads there wasn't anywhere else they'd rather be. 

"We will, by God we will..."


End file.
